Sad Day
Good afternoon, Patrons -
Last night an emergency meeting was called by the Board’s new Chief Financial Officer, Mark Foster, who provided the group with a 376 page overview of the organizations financials as impacted by COVID and last years event.
TL/DR at the bottom.
During a grueling three hour presentation , Mr. Foster ran through a series of graphs with downward pointing arrows and titles like “catastrophic fiscal deficit” coupled with questionable remarks directed at the governing body’s “frivolous” spending habits that included a full scale event house renovation during the worst ever market conditions.
In addition, large spikes in shipping costs, product scarcity, and panic buying have brought expenses to an all-time high.
Despite the Board reminding Mr. Foster that the investments made into AMC, CLNE, and WISH were surely to “moon” at any moment despite being down 12.8% at Friday’s market close, it was determined that for the best interest of the organization and its patrons that a change would need to be made. We here do not want to taper back any of the existing activities or offerings at the festival. We vow to our patrons not to ever “cheapen it up” or throw some “Busch League Backyard BBQ”. There will be wagyu. There will be explosions. There will be chlorine for the pool (thanks to a shady deal with a East Asian chlorine facility). With that said, we’re forced to implement the following:
TL/DR: Due to rising costs across the nation on shipping charges, fuel, product scarcity, and pretty much everything else that is fun, the Board has had no choice but to raise entry fees this year.
Adult Admission: $20
Kids: Free if you can carry them or can’t ride all the rides at an amusement park, otherwise they’re be classified as an adult.
We apologize for the inconvenience, but we are very much looking forward to enjoying the upcoming holiday with all of you.
Cheers and Happy Fathers Day to all the Dads out there.
U up?
Ladies and gentlemen,
We know this is the moment you’ve all been waiting for - Early Registration for Linglepalooza 2021 is now OPEN!
Save the Date: July 3rd
The first 50 people who RSVP during the Early Registration period gain access the “Camp Sight” the night prior, and can join the Board of Directors festivities the night before Linglepalooza.
Early Registration closes on May 21st. Act fast to claim your spot!
We are so excited to see you all this year. YOU are the reason we are here.
Talk soon.
2020 and Beyond
As the 2020 Season of Linglepalooza draws slowly to a close, and we hold onto this Summer for as long as possible, we have to remind ourselves not to focus on the past. Enjoy the moment, sure, but we must always be focused on the future.
With that said, while we have some future events planned, we’re happy to announce that we are officially kicking off our Linglepalooza 2021 planning and discovery process! But for next year to be a success, we need help from YOU.
Linglepalooza will always be open to all, but if you want to help out in the future, consider becoming a supporter through our Patreon below. There’s a lot of brisket, bevs, and booms to cover next year and we appreciate any and all support from our loyal base.
Here’s to finishing 2020 strong and planning [hoping] to have a much less socially distant 2021. Cheers!
22.05
22.05 pounds equals ten kilograms. But 244 years ago our forefathers decided to break away from the tyranny of so-called “royal” throne, and they held firm on two things: 1) Taxes suck and 2) we won’t build a nation on a completely ridiculous, outdated, metric system of measurements that had no chance of surviving in a modern, developed world. And with the stroke of Mr. Herbie Hancocks pen, the Standard system was born.
But, why 22..05? Well, there’s a lot of significance there:
Weight of John Adams’ miniature schnauzer, Otis
Approximate percent of Loyalists that were too scared of weak, old “King” George to pick up arms and fight for their freedom
Number of miles that Paul Revere had to ride to warn Sammy Adams that the cops were coming to try and break up the party,
Number of teabags (in millions) that were dumped in Boston Harbor, because we’re not pansies and drink coffee.
Amount of explosives stockpiled for the Rockets Red Glare fireworks display Saturday evening.
See you all soon.
Cheers -
T-MINUS 67:52:31
It is right around the corner, ladies and gents, and the absolute OUTPOURING of interest and support in the last few days has been unbelievable. We appreciate how excited everyone is - and so are we! This will be a great year indeed. In light of recent events, we wanted to also send out a friendly reminder to everyone. This year we’re going to need your support as well - not just the completely unpaid and overworked volunteers.
BYOC²
That’s right, with the huge crowds we’re going to see this year we’re asking that if you want to guarantee a cold bevvie for more than 12 minutes thanks to the new and improved Linglepalooza 2020 koozies, or if you don’t want to be forced to sit on a molten lava pool deck, then we are encouraging everyone to bring their own cooler and chair.
In addition, our amateur meteorological team is paying close attention to dew points and weather models, and we’re very happy to see it making a change for the better. It’s gonna be a hot one and we’re hoping it stays dry as well!
More updates to come. Cheers!
It’s been…
…one week since you looked at me
Cocked your head to the side
and said I'm angry
Five days since you laughed at me saying
Get that together come back and see me
Enough nonsense.
We’re one week away, folks! We figured we would give you our full entertainment lineup for the upcoming weekend.
Friday, July 3rd
12:00 PM - All Hands Meeting for Event Volunteers
2:00 PM - Early Registration Opens for “Camp Sight” attendees
6:00 PM - Pitmasters Arrive On-Site
8:00 PM - Downtown Carlisle Bar Crawl
2:00 AM - Quiet Hours in Effect
Saturday, July 4th
11:00 AM - Event Volunteer Family Brunch
12:00 PM - Vendor Registration and Setup
2:00 PM - Event Gates Open for General Admission
3:00 PM - PA Post-Collegiate Intramural Badminton Championships
4:00 PM - Pitmaster Dinner Available
5:00 PM - PA Pro-Am Regional Cornhole Championship
7:00 PM - Special Guests from the Goshen Township Fire Department arrive for fireworks setup
9:00 PM - South Middleton Township Independent Ginormous Fireworks Show sponsored by members of the Goshen Township Fire Department
10:00 PM - Pool Shot Dice
2:00 AM - Quiet Hours in Effect
It’s been quite the road up to this point! We can’t wait to see you all very, very soon!
Cheers -
14
We’re two weeks out and the team here is fully dedicated working what seems like never-ending overtime in preparation for this years event (which is weird because they’re volunteers not getting paid, and aren’t necessarily promised an invite to the event). We are absolutely blown away by the support you’ve shown not only us but our partners as well - the pre-orders for this years merch were out of control, so, if you haven’t nabbed a LP2020 koozie or other apparel I urge you to jump over to the store and grab one while you still can.
Also, extremely happy to announce that all vendors are officially confirmed for this year: Snake River Farms, Wenger’s Meat and Ice, Linglewood Farms, Back Forty Brewing, No Common Scents, TNT Fireworks, Phantom Fireworks, Troegs Brewing Company, Perdomo, Denim Coffee, Hershey Vineyards, Mission Winnow, and more. However, we’re still looking for volunteers to help provide basic essentials so if you’re interested in helping support this years event please reach out.
Status: Green
Ladies and Gentlemen -
With Cumberland County moving to the green phase of the states reopening plan this week, we are very proud to announce that the board is officially giving the greenlight for Linglepalooza 2020’s 4th of July extravaganza. This is a very exciting time for us all! We have heard from you and many have had to deal with cancelled trips, postponed events, and a little bit too much social distancing. Now, we all have something to look forward to, and with only 21 days to go!
If you have not already RSVP’d for this years main event, we urge you to do so now. Spots are filling up fast and its imperative that the board is able to lock in a headcount for this years festivities. For those of you that have RSVP’d early and grabbed a block at our camp sight, we are offering early registration and setup after 2PM on Friday, July 3rd. Our pitmasters will not be onsite until later in the evening when they will begin firing up the smokers for Saturdays feast so there will be limited food and refreshments available. Please plan accordingly, UberEats and DoorDash do service the event grounds. In addition, the Borough of Carlisle has recently relaxed the Open Container policy for downtown, so time permitting we urge you to explore the town and help support local small businesses.
Finally, the CDC and Pennsylvania Department of Health have provided guidelines for all businesses reopening, and Linglepalooza’s 4th of July event will be no different. We’ll be operating this years event with limited occupancy, and frequent cleaning and disinfection will take place. Social distancing of at least 6 feet will be encouraged for all Indoor and high-traffic areas. While we are all eager to let loose a little bit, we must still remember that we’re all having to adjust to the “new normal” and the board is fully invested in maintaining the health and safety of our attendees.
We want to thank all of you for sticking with us during these crazy times, and we’re all looking forward to spending some quality time with our friends. Should you have any questions or concerns, please reach out to us and we’ll be happy to address them.
Cheers -
Confirmed.
Well, sort of…
With Cumberland County recently moving to the Yellow Phase of Pennsylvania’s re-opening plan, we are proud to announce our plans to celebrate our event over Fourth of July weekend!
If we have not yet moved to Green state come July, the board will be forced to postpone the event.
As our state continues to respond to this global epidemic, the safety and health of our attendees is of the utmost concern. We will be making sure all areas are cleaned and sanitized, and single-serve food and beverage options will be provided as much as possible.
We’re taking the situation seriously - should you have any questions or concerns don’t be afraid to drop us a line through our Contact form on the site.
More updates to follow.
Cheers -